whoa. gut check.

I am in the process of thinking long and hard about “what I want to be when I grow up”. While I don’t think this will ever truly be answered in me because of my incessant desire to grow and change, I still need to make some clear decisions in the upcoming months, year(?), two (?), that will have fundamental impact on my trajectory. Of course, I am mostly trying to hear that still small, loud shouting voice of God to lead me to His will. I’m blessed with a team of prayer warriors who are helping me seek out my call. 

So today’s gut check, whoa God moment comes from this month’s book club selection, Into the Wild by Jon Krakauer. On p. 57, in a letter to one of his traveling companions, Alex/Chris writes, 

“So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man that a secure future.  The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure.  The joy in life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun……..

You are wrong if you think Joy emanates only or principally from human relationships. God has placed it all around us. It is in everything and anything we might experience. We just have to have the courage to turn against our habitual lifestyle and engage in unconventional living.” (p. 57, Into the Wild, Krakauer, 1996)

Well, ok then. Holy, crazy, thoughtful batman! I am deeply afraid of breaking free from security. And while I don’t plan to give away all my possessions and live as a nomad; tramping through the country and eventually trying to survive in Alaska, there are many things that I could do to bring more adventure in my life and to encounter new and different things.Breaking free of my habitual lifestyle choices that are negative and conventional like eating the S.A.D.  or spending inordinate amounts of money on books. Likewise, from his second point, and more importantly as I discern, it is crucial for me to look for the JOY all around me. In small things, in challenges, in pain. There will be “beauty from pain” as I take this next path in my life’s journey. I do not know what it shall be this time; I believe only God knows.

Wise words from a very interesting soul in this person-character in the book. I study the Bible every morning seeking wisdom and counsel; comfort and challenge. I love it when God knocks me out of the park with something away from His “predictable” Word. And today I can offer a great thank you.

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