I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the could’ves and should’ves in my life. Of course, there are a lot of pieces that “were supposed to be” in these last two months. The entire world has flipped around and it’s led me to wonder about planning and hoping. We make broad and detailed plans and we often get crushed when our plans fail–whether it be the roast in the oven, the lesson plan, the job interview, the lack of children, or the marriage. If we dwell in what has not come to pass, our hearts can easily get lost in sadness or despair. However, God steps in and reminds us…(as cliche as this verse is…)
How can I possibly know for sure what is in store? I cannot. Should I sit idly by? No, but I put my trust in the fact that no matter how hard I work and plan that the ultimate answers are not in my hands. This could break my heart or serve as a liberation. I see it as the latter; what a liberation to know that despite any pain or brokenness that I feel now, that it is not forever pain. (I have to talk myself into this regularly as do friends, but I know it logically that it is not lifetime pain.)
Sara Groves puts it best HERE (If you don’t know Sara Groves by now….you must listen to here entire collection on Spotify. Right now.)
As I stare down the tunnel to 2015, I put hope to work. I put the hope that I am not alone into practice. I put my hope in the future that is unknown and may be wild or sedate, raggedy or awesome, successful or wrought with failure. No matter what, I cling to the hope that all of the could’ves, should’ves, would’ves, mustnt’s, don’ts, won’ts will have a purpose for me.
“Hope is the memory of the future.” — Gabriel Marcel