supposed to. not there.

I’m supposed to be running right now. I told myself, “this week I’ll do it”; I’ll get out there running. Maybe even try a bagel run. But after a few attempts this week, 3 miles here, 5 miles there, I am still just not ready. I have no speed under me and I’m a ball of lethargy. I realize the only way to improve the speed is to actually run. I realize that when I run I gain energy.

I know all the things I’m supposed to be doing right now, but I’m just not there.  Everyone said it would happen, that after IM things would come crashing down. Well, I’m there. I’m supposed to be back to exercise, eating right, focused but I’m not there.. I know I need to set goals and I’m crying out for accountability to someone for it, but I’m not there.

I wonder when I will be there again.

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